


Backlash

by Sue Corkill (mscorkill)



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-14
Updated: 2012-04-14
Packaged: 2017-11-03 15:02:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/382665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mscorkill/pseuds/Sue%20Corkill
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hammond's resignation leads Jack to take drastic measures.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Backlash

**Author's Note:**

> I don't even remember now what motivated me to write a Chain Reaction fic, except it must've seemed like a good idea at the time. Now, I'm just happy it's finished. Enjoy!
> 
> Originally posted August 2003

BACKLASH

 

Sam knocked perfunctorily on the door and then entered the room. Daniel sat at his desk, his fingers steepled, a pensive look on his face. Teal'c sat behind him, by the credenza, his face impassive as usual, but Sam could see his displeasure in his even more rigid than usual posture. Only one person was missing from their impromptu 'team' meeting. Closing the door carefully behind her, she asked the silent men, "Where's the Colonel?"

 

Daniel looked at her over his fingers. "He didn't tell you?" His voice was tired and resigned.

 

"Tell me what?" she asked, a fresh surge of unease joining the already seething emotions that she just barely had under control.

 

"O'Neill has been ordered to take time off." 

 

Sam's eyes flew from Daniel to Teal'c, not wanting to believe what he had just said. She looked back at Daniel for confirmation.

 

"It's true, Sam." Daniel sighed, finally dropping his hands to his lap. "Jack went to confront Bauer about our 'reassignments'. And, well, you know Jack."

 

She closed her eyes, no...he wouldn't have done anything that foolish! But, when she opened her eyes and Daniel didn't say anything more, but merely nodded his head, she knew that Jack had let his temper—and his mouth—run out of control and gotten himself into trouble with Bauer. Damn! The man was turning all the SGC teams on their ears and changing the whole atmosphere of the base. And now, with the Colonel gone, she had little hope for any kind of reprieve from the their new assignments. She was disheartened and confused—by all the changes at the base, and now by her lover's forced time off—something he hadn't even told her about!

 

"Where did he go?" Not that she expected either man to know, but she had to ask and she had to act like her guts hadn't just been ripped out by Jack's actions. 

 

"I don't know, Sam." Daniel took his glasses off, rubbing his eyes. "Just said he had some things to check out and he'd be in touch."

 

She plopped down on an empty stool. So, that was it? He'd be in touch? She tried to think optimistically, that he'd contact her separately, that he'd be waiting at her house when she got home tonight. Or he'd call her...or send her an email. God, she lowered her head, pressing her hands to her eyes. She and Jack had been lovers a little less than two weeks. And given the craziness of their mission schedule, she could still count on one hand the number of times they'd made love! And now this, well, her confidence in their relationship wasn't the strongest and the fact that he'd told Teal'c and Daniel that for all intents and purposes he'd been suspended and hadn't told her, did nothing to build her confidence. 

 

"He'll call, Sam." Daniel's earnest voice broke into her depressing thoughts and she looked up at him. "We'll figure out some way to get SG-1 back together." She nodded, trying to work up a smile. Unfortunately, it wasn't keeping SG-1 together that she was worried about right now, it was keeping her and Jack together.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Jack's mind was racing as he drove, his actions on auto-pilot as he tried to absorb what Hammond had told him. The NID were either totally arrogant or terribly desperate, taking the measures that they had to get a foothold in the SGC. And he had fallen right into their plans, because he wryly acknowledged, there was no way he would ever have gone along with anything Bauer said or did—so they had to get rid of him. His 'leave' would conveniently turn into something more permanent—like his forced retirement or hell, he supposed they might even go so far as to kill him—and make it look like an accident, of course. 

 

Just what the hell was he going to do about it? His options were severely limited, now that he no longer had free access to the SGC. Even though he was only technically 'on leave', he wasn't even sure if the guards would let him through the front gate. Of course, his team was still there, but he wouldn't ask any of them to jeopardize their positions to help him. Which left him with one option he really didn't want to even seriously consider, but which might end up being his only alternative, since he couldn't operate within the usual channels. He knew someone who would help him operate in the gray area that the NID carried out their activities, especially the unofficial ones. It just remained to be seen if he could convince Maybourne to help him.

 

Dusk was just settling as Jack turned onto his street. "Shit," he cursed tiredly when he saw the black, nondescript, late model car parked at the end of his block. He might be verging on paranoia regarding the NID since Hammond's revelations, but he recognized a stakeout when he saw it. He drove on past his house and the car parked there, keeping a close watch in the rear-view mirror. They didn't follow him, so either they hadn't made his truck or he already had a tail. He drove aimlessly for several miles until he was convinced he was on his own. Stopping at the next stoplight, he looked around and realized he was only a few blocks from Sam's house. 

 

Somehow the unexpected events of the day—and his visit with Hammond—had thrust all thoughts of her from his mind. He still wasn't used to thinking of them as a couple. Their relationship was still too new and fresh. And though they had weathered much together as CO and subordinate, this—he realized uneasily—was going to be something totally different. The entire structure of their professional relationship had been totally changed with the departure of Hammond and the arrival of Bauer and his restructuring of the SGC. Hell, SG-1 didn't exist anymore. Sam was no longer under his command—fuck, he didn't even have a command anymore! It could be the perfect answer to their situation, if he didn't do anything, if he would just leave the NID and Bauer alone. But Jack knew he wouldn't be able to rest until he'd discovered their motives for replacing Hammond with Bauer.

 

The whole situation stank to high heaven. The conversation with Hammond was still too fresh in his mind—and the image of his granddaughters in the hands of NID too disturbing. Jack had been involved in some questionable missions and activities, but nothing that ever involved threatening the lives of innocent children. Hard on the heels of that thought came another. Sam...if the NID would go so far as to threaten Hammond's granddaughters, he knew they'd have no problem with threatening or even killing Sam. Granted, she might be more important to their plans alive, but she could still be used as leverage against him. And given what he was already planning on doing, if they knew...if they found out.... Which meant that he'd just have to make sure they didn't. Sam was too important to him and he would do anything to protect her.

 

Jack drove the few blocks to Sam's house, pulling into the alley behind the house and shutting off the ignition. No point in advertising his presence to anyone whom happened to be passing by. He just sat there for a few moments then, his mind racing as he tried to think of some other way to handle this. But his time was limited and this was the only sure way that he could think of to protect her. Letting himself in the backdoor with the key she'd just give him two days earlier, Jack quietly entered her house and hung his coat in the small breezeway. Sam wasn't in the kitchen, though he could see remnants of take-out Chinese on the counter. And while the smell of fried rice and sweet and sour something should have been appetizing, it wasn't. Taking a deep breath, Jack clamped down on his emotions and went to destroy his lover before the NID could.

 

She was in the living room, reading. She looked up, setting her book aside and from the expectant look on her face, he knew she had heard him come in. Her eyes lit up when she saw him, though he could also see the faintest tinge of caution. He just stood in the doorway and she jumped up, crossing quickly to his side. He steeled himself not to respond when she kissed him and when he made no move to return the kiss, she stepped back, confusion marring her lovely features. 

 

"Jack? What's wrong?"

 

"I've been suspended and you ask what's wrong?" He snorted, walking past her over to the cabinet where she kept the liquor. Pouring himself a scotch, he drank it—not just for affect but because he knew he would need it to get through the next few minutes.

 

She stood awkwardly in the middle of the room. "I thought you were just told to take some leave time?"

 

"It doesn't really matter now, does it? Bauer just didn't have the balls to make it official. Bottom line is they've taken me out of the SGC." He gave her an insolent look. "And from what I hear, you're Bauer's little lapdog, building him his naquada bomb," he added snidely.

 

She didn't flinch, she didn't show any outward response to his attack. But he could tell he'd wounded her. He knew her too well and could read the sudden stillness in her body and the shuttered look now present in her eyes. "What do you want me to do? Get suspended like you?" Her voice was still reasonable, though he picked up the faint quiver in it.

 

"Nah," he poured himself another Scotch. "You go right ahead and keep doing what you're doing. Be Bauer's little yes-girl."

 

"Jack, that's not fair." 

 

Good, she was starting to get angry. "Yeah, well it's not fair I got suspended. So, you just stay there, nice and cozy, in your lab at the SGC. Hell, you might want to consider taking on Bauer." He swallowed down the Scotch and went for the kill before he could change his mind. "I mean, since you don't seem to have a problem with screwing a superior officer."

 

"You bastard!" The sound of her hand connecting with his cheek cracked through the now silent room. His head snapped back and he stepped back a pace. Her eyes flashed with anger and despair. The anger didn't bother him but he felt his gut tighten at the despair.

 

"Can't face the truth, Sam?" he asked blandly.

 

She turned her back on him then, and even though she didn't turn around when she spoke, he heard her clearly enough. "I think you'd better leave."

 

She was right and even though she had reacted just the way he wanted, it took everything he had to turn around and walk out of her house. Pulling on the jacket he'd just removed, he opened the back door, when her voice stopped him. "Jack?" He turned his head and looked at her. Her beautiful face was pale and he could see the shiny trickle of tears on her cheeks. "I thought we had something special, but I guess I was wrong."

 

His hand gripped the doorknob so hard, his knuckles turned white. He could hear the plea in her voice and it almost broke him, but he didn't say anything, didn't even acknowledge that he'd heard her. He just opened the door and slipped quietly out. Getting into his truck, Jack rested his head wearily on the steering wheel. It had worked, she should be safe from anyone trying to get to him through her...so, why didn't he feel any better? Because he'd just destroyed the best thing to happen to him in a very long time and he had serious doubts as to whether she'd ever forgive him.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Sam scribbled in her notebook, the numbers dancing in front of her eyes, seeming to mock her attempts to turn the small amount of refined naquada they currently had on hand into something that would meet the requirements for Bauer's weapon. Her head was aching, but not half as much as her heart. Setting her pencil down, she stared blankly at the page in front of her. When she wasn't doing naquada/lithium hydride equations, she was thinking about Jack. Her immediate anger had faded almost as soon as he'd walked out the door that night and she'd been filled with a kind of numb despair ever since. She knew she'd taken a big risk in finally giving into the attraction that had simmered between them for all these years. She loved him and had decided that a relationship with him was worth the risks and so had Jack, or so she'd thought.

 

That he was angry over Hammond's resignation, she could accept. That he wouldn't get along with Bauer, she could also accept. What she couldn't accept was his total negation of her love. His words had been cruel and so unlike the Jack O'Neill she knew, she was still stunned that they had come from his mouth. And because it was so unlike the man she loved, she couldn’t help but think there was something more behind his abrupt dismissal of her. She sighed and picked up her pencil again, or maybe it was just wishful thinking on her part. Or maybe, she thought darkly, once he'd had her, his curiousity had been satisfied and Hammond's resignation and Bauer's arrival provided him with a golden opportunity to break it off with her. 

 

But that hadn't stopped her from driving by his house last night. And he wasn't there, that was obvious. His truck was gone and the house dark. He could have gone to his cabin, she supposed. Daniel would know, but pride kept her from asking him. She'd also almost called Jack at least a dozen times, going so far as to actually dial his cell number and then chickening out and not letting the call ring through. Oh god, she was so totally pathetic or a glutton for punishment, she wasn't sure which! All she knew was that while he heart was breaking, her gut was screaming at her that something was very, very wrong. 

 

Someone coughed from her doorway and she sighed, it was Daniel. She really wasn't sure she wanted to see anyone, but she looked up and gave him a slight smile, which he took as an invitation to enter. Rounding her desk, he leaned against it and she smiled gamely at him, not wanting to arouse his suspicions. Everyone was already stressed enough as it was.

 

"Hey," she murmured. "How's it going?"

 

"Oh, the usual." He was studying her from behind his glasses and she smiled blandly at him. "SG-12 brought back some interesting artifacts from P4C-987." Frowning slightly, he added. "Of course, it would have been nice to see where they had been found." He sighed and adjusted his glasses. 

 

Her smile turned genuine, she had missed him more than she'd realized.

 

"What about you?" he asked. "The ah...bomb making coming along okay?"

 

Her smile faded. "Slowly." Tossing her pencil down, she stood and started pacing. "According to my calculations we don't have enough refined naquadah on hand to even begin to do what Bauer wants." 

 

"So...what do you think will happen?"

 

Stopping her pacing, she looked at him. "I really don't know, Daniel. If the Colonel were here..." her voice trailed off when she realized what she'd said. She couldn't keep the pain out of her voice when she added, "But he's not, is he?"

 

"He'll be back, Sam."

 

"How do you know that?" She shook her head, his last words still so vivid in her mind. "He seemed very bitter the last time I talked to him." At least that was mostly true, she rationalized. And all she wanted to admit to Daniel. She could see sympathy fill his eyes after her pathetic complaint and didn't know whether to hug him or slap him. 

 

"Ah, he called me this morning."

 

"Really?" she asked, her heart leaping but determined to remain nonchalant and not be so pitiful as to beg Daniel to tell her everything that he'd said.

 

"Yes." Daniel straightened up then, his posture no longer casual as he crossed in front of her and carefully closed the door. She watched his unusual behavior curiously. He turned back to her, his voice low when he spoke. "He wouldn't tell me everything, Sam. But he's gone to see someone who might be able to help."

 

"Help? We need his help here, Daniel!"

 

"Jack seems to think that there's more to this than just Hammond retiring. He said something about the NID...." Daniel let his voice trail off and Sam didn’t need him to elaborate any further. If Jack suspected the NID were involved, that would explain a lot. And there could be only one person he'd go to for help, reluctantly, but he'd go.

 

"Maybourne." It was a statement, not a question and Daniel nodded. Sam slumped back down in her chair. "What's going on, Daniel? " she asked, unable to keep up the pretense any longer. Daniel would figure it out sooner or later anyway. "He wouldn't tell me anything."

 

"I don't know, Sam. But you know Jack, I'm sure he figures that he's protecting us by not telling us what he has planned."

 

She knew Daniel was probably correct in his assessment of Jack's motives and meant his words to comfort. But Jack's cruel words were still too fresh in her heart and mind, and she wasn't sure now if she could trust her judgement regarding their relationship. "I hope you're right, Daniel. I really hope you're right."

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

It had taken some fast-talking and one or two careful reminders about what Air Force One owed one Colonel Jack O'Neill, but terms had finally been agreed upon and he and Harry were on their way to Arlington. Jack eased back into the comfy leather seat, the private jet they were flying in courtesy of his White House benefactor. It had been made perfectly clear though, that once they landed in Arlington, they were on their own. Presidential largesse would only go so far and Jack figured he'd pretty much used all his favors with this particular one.

 

Harry was happily scrounging away in the small galley, emerging with an armful of snacks and bottled water. "Want some?" he mumbled, his mouthful of something.

 

O'Neill shook his head and looked out the window, ignoring his traveling companion. 

 

"Suit yourself, Jack." Harry went to a seat in front of his, which suited Jack perfectly. He didn't want to have to make small talk with the other man. It would be more than he could do, given the circumstances. The flight to Arlington would take about two and a half-hours, Jack closed his eyes and settled back into his seat, hoping to nap. But sleep eluded him, his actions of the last forty-eight hours playing through his mind, giving him little peace.

 

Maybourne had accused him of being willfully naïve and maybe he was right. Circumstances had changed, he had changed and if he was trying to recapture part of himself that had been lost over the years, well that was his business. What Harry didn't know, and Jack had no intention of telling him, was that he'd already gotten his hands dirty in this particular sandbox. He felt a bit like Lady MacBeth, his hands were covered in the blood of his last conversation with Sam, his lover, the woman who made his soul complete. She had entered his life and somehow filled all the rough and missing places the years and the toll of his work had taken. Would she forgive him? Would she let him back into her life? Would she even talk to him and let him explain?

 

He wasn't used to explaining his actions to anyone. And while Major Carter might not ask for an explanation, Sam Carter, his lover would—and deserved one. He knew he'd made a unilateral decision regarding their relationship. His ex-wife had repeatedly reminded him that that wasn't how relationships worked and evidently he still needed to be reminded. But his over-riding fear for Sam had driven him to take any input into the decision away from her. And while he knew Major Carter very well, he was only beginning to know his lover and while Major Carter would understand, but he wasn't so sure about his lover.

 

Jack heard Harry give a loud burp and grimaced. He didn't trust the man and he also knew that Maybourne never did something for nothing. With Harry, charity started at home and he'd have to be extra careful once their mission was accomplished. Whenever and however the hell that would eventually happen.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

"Major, the whole point of the experiment is to determine how destructive the device will be. Request denied."

Though she figured it wouldn't do anything except get her reprimanded, Sam protested. "But, Sir—"

"Proceed with the preparations." Bauer's tone told her he didn't care what she had to say, her only role was to do as ordered.

"Yes, sir," she snapped, not caring that her tone bordered on insolence. Making her way back to her lab, Sam gathered up her notes and the laptop. That Bauer didn't have a clue about what he was dealing with was obvious. She was rapidly coming to the conclusion that Jack was right, that the NID were up to their eyeballs in what was happening on the base now and Bauer was their front man. Whether Bauer knew it or not was something she hadn't quite worked out. He might just be a patsy, just like she was a patsy in their great scheme to develop weapons of mass destruction. 

 

And there didn't seem to be a damn thing she could do about it, except get herself taken off the project completely. She had come to the reluctant conclusion that it would be better to stay involved so at least she would be around to clean up whatever mess they got themselves into. And while Jack's dismissal of their relationship still hurt, it was an ache she was getting used too and he currently seemed their best hope of finding out whatever or whoever was behind all the changes at the SGC.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Jack put the red phone down, Maybourne's parting, "Thanks for all your help", ringing unpleasantly in his ears. 

"General, about what you owe me?" Jack turned back to Hammond.

"Anything I can do," Hammond said sincerely, and Jack knew he meant it.

"Well, nothing right now. But one day I may ask you to buy back my soul." That is, if he couldn't redeem it back from Sam first. And then there might be another indulgence he'd ask the general, but first he needed to see Sam and do some serious groveling.

 

"Well, General...if that's everything. I am still officially on leave until tomorrow."

 

Hammond smiled understandingly at him and nodded. "I'll see you bright and early at 0800 hours tomorrow."

 

Jack smiled faintly and with a half-salute, turned and left Hammond's office. For the first time since this whole mess started, he was finally beginning to feel hope return. Bounding down the stairs, he was mildly disappointed to see no sign of his major in the control room. With a casual nod to the startled technicians on duty, he continued through the room and went in search of Sam. 

 

And twenty minutes later, he came to the conclusion that she was nowhere on base. Since he was currently on Level Eighteen, he decided to see if Daniel was around. Peeking around the corner of his open office door, he found Daniel busily stuffing items into a backpack. "Going somewhere?" he asked, casually wandering into the room.

 

Daniel looked up briefly. "Ah, yes, as a matter of fact I am." 

 

Jack was confused, he knew Hammond had only returned a few hours ago. "Any place I know?"

 

"Ah, probably not." Daniel closed up his pack and grabbed his boonie hat off the desk.

 

"Daniel?"

 

"Ah, right. P4C-987 with SG-12. They sent back some interesting artifacts and Hammond just gave the okay for me to go join them."

 

"So, Carter and Teal'c going with you?" He tried to stay casual but knew he hadn't fooled Daniel when the other man suddenly lost his distracted look.

 

"Teal'c is still out with SG-3 for another two days. And Sam has actually taken some time off, Jack." 

 

Jack raised an eyebrow. 

 

"She was pretty upset, Jack. By everything that happened."

 

"You mean with Bauer and the bomb?"

 

Daniel looked directly at him and his face had that serious look that told Jack he wasn't going to like what Daniel said next. "Partly, but I think she's mostly upset with you."

 

"I don't know what you're talking about, Daniel." It was a lie, but he didn't want Daniel involved in his private life any more than necessary.

 

Picking up his pack, Daniel walked past him to the door, plopping his hat on his head before turning and pinning Jack with a knowing look. "You should have told her." And with that pronouncement, he turned and walked away.

 

Jack just stood there for a long moment after Daniel left. It didn't matter what he should have done, it was too late now. What he needed to do now was find Sam and explain.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Sam looked up from her computer when the familiar sound of Jack's truck roared up her alley. Glancing at the clock, she saw it was just early afternoon. Evidently he hadn't wasted anytime in tracking her down, which should somehow comfort her, but didn't. She had been longing for and yet at the same time, dreading this moment. And she had really hoped she would see him on base. But of course, by not being on base when she had known he would be returning, she had forced this situation. She hadn't heard all the details yet, but had heard enough to know that Jack and Maybourne had somehow foiled the NID's plans and Hammond was once more in charge of the SGC. She had also heard rumors that Maybourne had escaped custody while being transferred to another facility. Which really didn't make one bit of difference to the situation between her and Jack.

 

And now he was here and what was she going to do? She hated him, she loved him, she didn't understand him and she knew him better than she knew herself. And she had missed him more than she thought possible. Oh, she had missed the physical closeness and incredible sex, but more than that, she missed having the constant reassurance that he was there—with her—beside her and always there to watch over her. If Daniel was right, and his actions had merely been his way of protecting them, then there was plenty for two of them to discuss. 

 

She hadn't bothered with changing the locks, so she wasn't surprised when she heard the back door open. She was however pissed that he felt he could just waltz into her house without an invitation, especially after all that had happened the last time that she'd seen him. Closing the program she'd been working on, she stood and wiped her suddenly sweaty palms on her jeans. God, her hands were shaking! She was more nervous than she liked, which only made her more annoyed—with herself and with him. She'd faced system lords with less trepidation. Sam smiled thinly, of course then only her life was at stake, now her heart was on the line. 

 

Jack boldly walked in and her heart sang at the sight of him. She studied him critically; he looked thinner and there were new lines etched on his face. But worst of all was the bleak look in his dark eyes, shadows that lately had started to fade once more all too visible in his face. She could feel her anger start to dissolve and while she wanted nothing more than to take him her arms and hold him until the shadows went away, there was still the issue of their estrangement.

 

"Hey." 

 

Just that one word, nothing else. How silly of her to think that since he had actually sought her out, he might actually initiate their conversation. "You're back."

 

"Yeah, mission accomplished."

 

"Good guys win again?"

 

"For the most part."

 

She nodded. For the most part they had won and in regards to the bomb she'd help create, been damn lucky that they were still alive.

 

"Heard you had some excitement."

 

"The usual."

 

He mouthed an 'oh' but didn't say anything and she didn't either, waiting for him to make the next move.

 

"So..."

 

He just looked at her and she felt her patience begin to fray and then totally unravel. "So...that's it? You just walk back in here and we what? Pick up where we left off? Well, let me just remind you where we left off. The last time you were here, you all but called me a whore and encouraged me to go screw General Bauer." A slight flush filled his face, which gave her some satisfaction. 

 

"This isn't easy for me, Sam," he finally rumbled, rubbing one hand over his face in a gesture she knew all too well. "I'm not used to having to explain myself."

 

She sighed, she could sense his frustration filling the small room. She knew this was hard for him, but if they didn't get this sorted out now, then they might as well just call it quits. She might be completely mistaken, but there was something about his last comment that told her what to say next. "You're not used to explaining yourself to Major Carter. Which is fine, actually. What isn't fine is using that same approach with your lover."

 

He sighed then and sat down heavily in the overstuffed chair next to her computer desk. "God, Sam, don't you think I don't know that?"

 

"Then why did you do it?" she asked softly, more curious now than mad.

 

"Because it was the only way I could think to protect you."

 

"Protect me?" Now she was confused. Why would he feel the need to protect her?

 

"From the NID. They were watching my house." He looked at her, his face grim. "I know what they're capable of, Sam. They would have used you against me in a heartbeat. And I wasn't going to let that happen."

 

"So you decided to take me out of the equation?"

 

"Something like that."

 

"You were very convincing." The pain of his rejection was still too fresh for her to let it pass without some kind of acknowledgement.

 

A flash of pain crossed his face. "I'm sorry, Sam. But I'd rather have you hating my guts than lying dead in some dumpster."

 

She shivered, intellectually she knew that the NID could be ruthless, but she was only beginning to realize how naïve she really was when it came to the darker side of covert ops. She only had her imagination, while Jack had the reality. Crossing the few steps that brought her to his side, she knelt down in front of him. Taking one of his large, callused hands and holding it with tender care in her two, much smaller more slender hands, she started to talk. "I know you want to protect me and I love you for that." His eyes flew to hers and she smiled tenderly, the look of longing in his eyes filling her with a corresponding hope. "But if we're to make this work, then we're in this together, equal partners. None of this deciding what is or isn't better for the other person."

 

"I just want you to be safe," he mumbled.

 

She released his hand and cradled his face between her hands. "And I want the same for you. But we do this together or we don't do it at all." He was quiet for so long that she was afraid she'd lost him, that he wouldn't be able to let her into his heart as completely as she let him into hers. 

 

"Then we do it together because god knows, I can't do it without you."

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Jack watched as relief flooded her face and the ice inside him finally melted. Hauling her into his arms, he held her tightly, burying his face in her hair. Oh god, it felt so good to have her back in his arms. "I've missed you," he murmured, nuzzling her ear.

 

"It was your own damn fault," she retorted. 

 

He chuckled at the annoyance in her voice and pulled back just far enough so he could see her face. "Yeah, well, I'll admit I'd much rather have spent the last week with you instead of Maybourne."

 

"Just what did you two do?"

 

His eyes darkened again and he wasn't sure how much to tell her. But, if they were in this together, she needed to know how far into Harry's dirty little world he'd gone. "I called in some favors and then threatened a United States Senator at gunpoint."

 

"Kinsey?" She didn't look shocked, though her eyes were still troubled.

 

"The one and only." Jack sighed, stroking his fingers through her hair. "We have enough on him and his connections to the NID that they'll leave us alone—for awhile anyway."

 

"It's bad enough that we have to worry about the Goa'uld, but to have to worry about our own people!"

 

"That's the way the game's played, Sam." He finally smiled, amused by her indignant look. "And right now the good guys are ahead."

 

"The good guys?" she questioned, her eyes suddenly bright with what could only be mischief. She started toying with the collar of his shirt, her nimble fingers sliding down the front placket. His breath caught when her fingers just brushed teasingly against his skin and then he gulped, his mouth going dry when she grabbed a fistful of his shirt and pulled him closer. "Just how good are you, Jack O'Neill?" she whispered, her lips brushing temptingly against his.

 

"Oh, I can be good," he murmured, sliding one large hand to her nape and threading his fingers through her short hair. "Very, very good..." his hand tightened, holding her still and he finally claimed her lips in a searing kiss. Oh god, the sweet taste of her mouth opening for him was the most potent of aphrodisiacs. Sweeping his tongue deep for one last taste, he pulled back, nipping lightly at her lips. Ignoring her soft whimper of protest, he grabbed her under her arms and hauled her to her feet as he stood. Her study was hardly the place to demonstrate just how good he could be. 

 

"Jack," she pouted, running her hands up his chest and pressing soft kisses to his throat. "You're not being very good." He growled and swept her up in his arms. Her arms fastened around his neck and she buried her face in his neck. "You're getting better," she sighed. 

 

He carried into the hallway and stopped when he realized he wasn't sure where her bedroom was located. The few times they'd been together had always been at his house. "Ah, Sam?"

 

"Hmmm?" she murmured, letting her head rest back on his shoulder. 

 

Looking down at her, he felt a shaft of pure arousal roar straight to his groin. Her blue eyes were drowsy with passion, her lips moist and inviting, her breasts pressing nicely against his chest and if he didn't get her into bed ASAP.... "Your bedroom?"

 

Comprehension filled her eyes and her lips curved in a slow smile. "Last door on the right," she told him, gesturing vaguely toward the front of the house. 

 

He hoisted her up a bit more in his arms and headed down the hallway Sam had indicated and shouldering the last door on the right open, he carried her into the bedroom. The curtains were open, the bright afternoon sun shining in the room. The general impression Jack got of the room was of calm and peace, the soft blues and greens and dark wood of the furniture all creating an inviting atmosphere. Which at any other time he might take the opportunity to appreciate, but not right now. Right now there was only one thing he wanted to appreciate.

 

Tossing Sam gently down onto the bed, Jack slipped off his shoes and socks. He knelt with one knee on the mattress then, chuckling when their hands met at the hem of her sweater. Her grin was sassy as she lifted her arms over her head and he quickly pulled her sweater off, flinging it aside. She beat him to the fastening of her bra though, but he hooked his fingers in the front and managed to pull it off her. "Anxious?" she asked, her eyes brimming with laughter and then she smiled innocently at him and laid back on the pillows, arching her back and raising her pelvis towards him. 

 

He made a sound that was somewhere in between a groan and a whimper. Sam looked so incredibly sexy, presenting herself to him that way, wordlessly inviting him to continue undressing her. Reaching for the fastening of her jeans, he wasn't surprised to see that his hands were shaking. The sensible part of him warned he should be cautious of how fast she could arouse him and how fully she hand invaded his life. But the part of him that craved her tender love and attention was far stronger—and was probably the more sensible part of his brain anyway. 

 

Somehow he managed to finish unbuttoning her fly and then swiftly tugged her jeans and panties down and off her slender legs. They joined the rest of her clothes on the floor and he paused for a moment and simply looked at her. She lay back and stretched languidly before relaxing against the pillows. God, she was so gorgeous and she didn't even realize what she did to him with her unconscious movements. Her expression was one of relaxed contentment, the long delicate line of her throat inviting his kisses, her pale breasts with their rosy tips just begging for his hands...his mouth.... His eyes traveled hungrily down her smooth belly, wanting nothing more than to kiss his way across her silky flesh, to hear her cry out his name in helpless pleasure as he touched and caressed her intimately.

 

It took her took her a long minute to realize that he hadn't moved, hadn't done anything and she smiled uncertainly at him, a self-conscious look suddenly filling her face. She shifted restlessly then and one of her hands started to tug at the comforter. "No," he told her, placing his hand over hers, stopping her feeble attempt to cover herself. His deep brown eyes fastened on hers and he smiled tenderly, "Don't hide yourself from me."

 

"I just..." her voice trailed off and she cleared her throat, her hand moving in his until she could grip his fingers. "This is all just so new. Sometimes I can't believe that this has finally happened, that we're together." Her lips twisted in a wry smile then, "Especially with everything that conspires to keep us apart."

 

"Not to mention over-protective Colonels," he added dryly.

 

Her smile turned tender and her blue eyes softened with love and understanding. "Protective is fine," she murmured, "we can work on the 'over' bit."

 

"What did I ever do," he asked in renewed wonder, releasing her hand and caressing her cheek, "to deserve you?"

 

She turned her face into his caress and kissed his palm, holding it to her face. "I might ask you the same thing."

 

Her completely candid and unexpected response totally disarmed him again for the second time that day. Pulling her up and into his arms, his big body shuddered against hers as he tried to get his emotions under control. She squirmed against him and he reluctantly loosened his grip, her hands working there way up his chest to cradle his face between them. His emotions were still too close to the surface and he tried to look away, but she wouldn't let him, her hands holding him firmly in place.

 

"Don’t hide from me," she pleaded, her beautiful blue eyes suspiciously bright. Her words were an uncanny repetition of his earlier request, however the meaning was subtly different. 

 

It was his nature, both learned and innate, to conceal his true self and feelings. But for Sam, and for her unconditional love and acceptance, he wouldn't hide. "No," he vowed, "never again." 

 

Jack didn't know who moved first, but they were kissing, an almost frantic mating of their mouths that eventually settled into a slow, leisurely sharing. Jack gradually lowered her to the bed; following her down and covering her with his lean body. Their kiss continued unbroken, and while the initial urgency had abated, Jack could feel the resurgence of the insatiable need that only Sam could assuage. Insistent hands tugged at his shirt and he groaned into her mouth, tugging on her lower lip before rearing back and, not even bothering to undo any of the buttons, Jack pulled the shirt over his head. Evading Sam's grasping hands, Jack rolled onto his back next to her and quickly shucked off his jeans and boxers. 

 

Sam loomed over him, and when he would have sat up, her slender hand pressed firmly on his chest. He let her push him back down onto the mattress, the determination and hunger in her gaze and eager touch telling him he wouldn't be sorry. The hand in the middle of his chest stayed there, her touch turning into a lingering caress that trailed lightly down his belly. His breath caught when her touch just skirted his groin, his penis straining towards her but she ignored it, letting her hand came to rest on his hip. She gave a low, throaty laugh at his groan of frustration and leaned forward, placing an all too brief kiss on his lips. 

 

His disappointment was short-lived however, because her mouth began a tantalizing journey down his throat, nibbling and kissing her way down to his chest. He grunted softly when she suddenly plopped down on his thighs, straddling them. Reaching up, he grasped her waist, steadying her as she regained her balance. Her lips curved into a sultry smile and she murmured, "Thanks."

 

Jack watched with avid interest when she ran her hands in a teasing caress up his ribs, her hands coming to rest on his shoulders. He groaned softly when she shifted and leaned down, trapping his rigid length against her soft belly. She chuckled softly and rubbed herself against him before molding her body to his and planting butterfly kisses on his face. Jack ran his hands slowly up and down her back, stroking the smooth muscles, causing her to move against him in an all-over caress. And it felt so good, to have her breasts pressed warmly against his chest, her somehow soft—yet firm—belly snuggled against his penis and her teeth nibbled hungrily at his earlobe. 

 

Running his hands down her back to her ass, he caressed her firm flesh, sure fingers delving into her hidden secrets. She seemed to momentarily lose her concentration, sagging against him and moaning softly with his touch, as he stroked through her silky flesh. Each and every movement of her body against his only served to inflame his senses even more and remind him of how much he'd missed her the past weeks. She was the missing part of him and he needed her now.

 

"Sam," he growled, his hands at her waist now, encouraging her to sit up. Her whimpered protest was brief and with a quick kiss, she complied and sat up, kneeling gracefully over him. 

 

"Yes, Jack?" she drawled, her hands busy tracing random patterns on his chest, his abdomen. Her casual touch didn't fool him, though. He could hear the slight quiver in her voice and the fine trembling in her hands as she caressed him. Tightening his grip on her waist, he exerted gentle pressure, drawing her closer to him. He could feel the minute resistance to his touch and groaned her name again.

 

"What do you want, Jack?" Her voice was strained and her muscles trembled even more under his hands, as she refused to let him pull her any closer to his straining erection. 

 

Silently vowing that he'd have her begging him the next time, he yielded to her gentle demand. "You," he groaned, "only you."

 

He didn't begrudge her the look of triumph that flashed in her eyes, as it was quickly replaced with one of desire-filled concentration and then the cool touch of her hand on his penis. His hips jerked, instinctively seeking the deeper joining that awaited him in her loving body. And then she was guiding him to her. Jack gritted his teeth, his hands clenching tightly on her hips as she ever so slowly took him. It was always breathtaking, the initial resistance to his intrusion and then the exquisite pleasure as she gradually let him in, her delicate muscles quivering frantically around him while she adjusted to his length and girth. They both moaned when she finally settled her full weight down on him, taking him completely into her silky depths.

 

Sam started rocking her hips slowly against him and Jack resisted the urge to take control. She was a picture of erotic beauty, poised above him; her eyes closed, her luscious red lips parted, a look of dreamy pleasure on her face as she rode him. He wouldn't deny her this indulgence and contented himself with encouraging her with soft caresses, fondling her breasts, tugging gently at her nipples. Her low moan of approval spurred him on and he lightly feathered his fingers down her belly and into the soft, damp curls pressed against him. 

"Jack," she protested breathlessly at his first, seeking touch and a hand suddenly closed around his wrist.

 

He looked up at her, surprised by her objection and the trepidation on her face. Tenderness filled him, his feelings for Sam were so deeply embedded in his very being that he'd forgotten that in many ways this was all still very new to them—and her. "It's okay, baby. Let me help you." Her eyes searched his for long moments before she nodded and released her grip on his wrist. She resumed her steady movements against him, only this time she leaned back slightly, bracing her hands on his thighs. 

 

Her change in position allowed him easier access to her tender flesh. Jack stroked through her slick folds, lubricating his fingers with her arousal before seeking out her tender bud. Applying himself diligently to ensuring his lover's pleasure, Jack skillfully stroked her clitoris. Her movements quickened against him as she pressed herself against his hand, demanding his touch. Ignoring the almost unrelenting pressure of her tight sheath around him that demanded he give into his own release, Jack continued to caress Sam with calm assurance. Sam's breathless gasps soon coalesced into one drawn out cry of pleasure as Jack felt the first ripples of release spread through her. Caressing her steadily, he rode out her orgasm, catching her limp body when she eventually collapsed into his arms.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Sam moaned softly and tried to sink even deeper into the arms of her lover, random aftershocks of her climax still racing unchecked through her body. The ease with which Jack could arouse such ecstasy within her should have terrified her, but it didn't. He was her other half, which was both amazingly simple and frighteningly complex. And something that she was not going to question. Sam dimly realized that her lover was still hard inside her and that the hands tenderly stroking her back had stopped.

 

"Sam." Her name was low growl in her ear and when his arms suddenly wrapped around her, she barely had time to clutch at his shoulders before he rolled them. Sam lay pliant beneath her lover, clinging weakly to his shoulders while he draped her legs over his arms. She thought she had reached the maximum in sensation with her earlier release but found she was wrong, whimpering with renewed pleasure when their new positioned forced him even deeper inside her. 

 

"Jack," she moaned, her hands falling from his shoulders to grip his wrists as he started pounding heavily into her.

 

He paused momentarily, his voice strained as he asked, "Are you okay?"

 

Forcing her eyes open, she looked at her lover. His dark brown eyes were almost black with unfulfilled need, yet he still asked. Tender love filled her expression and she breathed, "Yes." His eyes flashed with fierce desire and with a low groan, he resumed his powerful movements into her body. Somehow finding a reserve of energy she didn't know she had, Sam wrapped her legs around his waist and started moving with him.

 

Always a powerful and determined lover, Sam was almost overwhelmed this time by his strength. She was helpless to control her body's response to him and when he shifted, placing subtle pressure on her already highly sensitive flesh, she was lost. Carried along by his passion, Sam felt the first faint tendrils of another orgasm building steadily inside her. Jack continued moving steadily within her, each inward thrust propelling them both closer to release. 

 

Her lover suddenly cried out hoarsely and thrust deep, grinding his pelvis against her. Sam gasped, arching up to meet him, her second orgasm rolling through her in one, long swell of rapture. Jack groaned harshly in response and collapsed on her, his hips continuing to jerk erratically against her even as he filled her with his seed, her internal muscles contracting insistently around him, bringing them both endless pleasure. 

 

Sam slowly came back to awareness and this time she was sure she'd lost consciousness, the ecstasy of their combined orgasms completely overloading her senses. Jack was a heavy weight on her, but she didn't mind, she needed the closeness and connection after that incredible experience. Hell, after everything that had happened to them since Hammond's 'retirement', she could stay like this for a very, very long time. 

 

Shifting a bit to ease his weight on her more evenly, Sam sighed and began running her hands up and down his back in long, sure caresses. Every now and then he would still shudder against her and she knew he was slowly coming down from that altered plane of existence that she had just left. And it was nice, to just hold him with no barriers between them. Once they left the haven of her bed, god only knew what else would get in the way of their relationship, not that there wasn't already enough junk strewn in their path. Smoothing her fingers through his hair, she felt his muscles start to tighten and knew their brief moment of sanctuary was coming to a close.

 

He groaned and Sam let her arms fall from around him as he levered himself off her body and flopped onto his back next to her. Unwilling to let the moment end, she immediately rolled onto her side and nestled against him, her head resting on his chest. Sam found the sound of his heart beneath her ear and the soothing rise and fall of his chest as he breathed infinitely comforting. And when he began idly toying with her hair she relaxed even more.

 

His voice rumbled up from his chest, "Are we okay?"

 

She didn't even need to think about her answer. "Yeah, we're okay." Twisting her head back so she could see his face, she added, "We're more than okay." Deep brown eyes looked back at her and she smiled, sliding the hand that had been resting on his chest up to caress his cheek. 

 

"Good," was all he said. Sam let her hand drift back down his chest and relaxed once more against him. If there were good, she decided, then that was more than enough.

 

THE END


End file.
